RPG A traditional primary school game. Also known as 'Doctors and Nurses' and 'Can I Feel Your Tits?'.

shelf life Longevity. Wendy Richards hasn't got it. Anna Ford, on the other hand...

sim Alistair. Cadaverous English film star of the '50s and '60s. Not to be confused with Terry Thomas.

16bit John Prescott's chin.

session Mates, beer, Tekken and other delights.

Sessions A seriously unfunny comedian.

Sony Term of endearment used by police officers in ITV's The Bill. For example: "All right, Sony, come with me - you're nicked."

unplayable Bubsy 3D; Rugby Union.

uppage [up-idg] To 'up' someone; to get your foot in. Shout often heard from the terraces during an Actua Soccer 3 match. See diggage.

visuals A kind of ocular disorientation experienced by drug-takers like Dennis Hopper and Peter Fonda.

web Marti. Singer and showbiz star of the early '80s. Not to be confused with Marti Caine (who was just as crap).

world wide web The Spiderman fan club.

y Indeed.

zombie The flesh-eating 'undead' creatures featured in the Resident Evil games; a strong alcoholic cocktail; your general demeanour the next day after an all-night session playing Resident Evil and drinking zombies.