Wherever you're supposed to be, the skyscraper you just flattened has exactly the same properties as the thousand that came before it. Even the monsters vary only in appearance, since they all do exactly the same thing. There's a stats screen to try to persuade you that the giant pink lobster is actually different from the mutated mouse and the green lizard thing, but the most interesting statistic compares their relative walking speeds. How not thrilling.

The graphics have been updated since World Tour, with new renders for the characters and buildings, but the animation is still awful. The whole thing reeks of ineptitude, from start to finish. For example, the bottom of the screen is where tanks attack you and energy-giving pedestrians wander, but since it's often completely obscured by a strip of solid foreground scenery you can't judge where anything is.

Then there's the scrolling, which is a devilishly incompetent piece of design - you have to walk almost to the edge of the screen to get it to move, so you'll never know whether the next screen is stashed with evil tanks or tasty citizens until you're right on top of them. Not that you can see them anyway, mind.

Most genuinely terrible games are able to make you laugh for one reason or another - so bad it's brilliant, etc. Rampage Universal Tour is simply too boring to make anyone smile. One of the dullest ways to waste four perfectly good tenners.