... but what amazes me is wot they can do these days. I was only saying so much to my missus the other day. Frank, I says, that Jet Set Willy is the best new game out so far. Forget all that Dreamcost business, I says to 'im, if you wont a decent consol game you should buy the Vic 20. I mean, it's a good modem, innit? Or was that a band... ?

... but it's those tiny little consol fings which you can carry round with you wot I like most of all. Wot are they called? Game Kids? Great graphics they've got - especially on that flight sim - wot's it called? Championship Manager 3? Never seen better. Mind you, they just don't 'ave the 'ardware for all those soccer stats, do they? Nah... you'll never see Jimmy Black's Cue Ball come out on one of them fings...

... I liked that C-Police, though. Or was that Z Cars? I dunno, I don't 'old with all this PC business - you can't say anyfink these days, can you? I blame the Common Market... mind you, I don't like all this computer game violence these days. I won't allow me kids to play anyfink uvver than Grand Theft Auto. I let 'em surf the Net though. Educational it is. Only the other day my youngest was telling me 'ow he was getting into phonographic photography (wotever that is - it's all bleedin' Egyptian to me)...

... I dunno, the stuff kids learn today. One of mine is making a bomb for 'is school project."

At this point Game Kid nods off into a deep stupor, and wakes much later to find his driver still banging on, oblivious to all around him.

"As for the price of games these days. I ask ya: a pony? For a poxy game? I tell you, mate: 'arf of 'em are bleedin rip-orfs."

The Kid feebly nods his agreement with a trembling hand as, to his immense relief, the taxi slows to a halt. Looking outside he notes that the scene looks very un-Paddington-like. He can't put his finger on it - thinking it had been a while since he'd been through these parts - maybe the Taj Mahal dominating the skyline had something to do with it.

"Right then. 'Ere we are, Guvnor. That'll be 43 thousand, 722 quid to you mate."