This Week: Game Kid takes his woman on holiday to Newquay


Saturday

A good trip down here, although we had an argument just before we left! She caught me, you see, packing a Nintendo along with what I considered to be an ideal selection of travel games, but she wouldn't have it so we ended up playing 'I spy' on the journey. Still, things livened up a bit by the time we got to down to Devon: there was a huge traffic queue from Exeter, so using my new found Driver skills I made haste the rest of the way along pavements, grass verges, and through people's gardens. That certainly livened things up a bit.

"I spy with my little eye something beginning with 'P'," she said in her driest voice.

"Porch?" I suggested as we crashed through one of these, a couple of hanging baskets trailing behind us.

"No," she said, peering into the vanity mirror. "Police".


Sunday

"Why can't we be like other couples?" she asked me today as we relaxed on the beach.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that bloody thing for a start," she said jabbing a finger at my Game Boy.

"We're supposed to be celebrating our fifth anniversary for goodness' sake and all you can do is mess about with your bloody games!"

She seemed quite cross. "Errr..."

"Why don't we ever do anything romantic like other, 'normal' couples?"

"We do!"

"I hardly think last year's so called anniversary counts".

"Why ever not?"

"Mike and Sheila had a table for two at the Ritz, and what did we have? Two-bloody-player something or other."

"It was V-Rally actually."