PR folk are usually a happy breed, free of any tedious brain activity that might make them question themselves, and they are always your besty mate. Their sleek coats and immovable haircuts are the product of grazing on restaurant fodder, service station snacks and spritzers.

They are normally unworried about the details of the games they are pushing, their main task being to spread their seeds - PR people are not human, they propagate their species in a similar way to vegetables and other plants. Their seeds, camouflaged to blend into most gaming environments, come in many exotic shapes: T-shirts, plane tickets, hotel rooms in Le Mans, exciting plastic water/laser guns, small metal badges.

These seeds all have one thing in common though - they have evolved to be attractive to journalists and retailers - the second part of the breeding unit. These 'carriers' act like bees, beetles and other seed-transporting bugs and vermin by engaging the PR people in "conversations". These merry dances are a joy to watch for the outsider, they usually entail booze, air-kissing and the passing of PR seeds to their carriers.

However, a herd of PR people who have been removed from contact with make-up (female), copies of Loaded (male), mobile phones (all), Travellers' Fare pastrami and dill pickle sarnies (all), Marlboro Lite (all) and credit cards (all) for two weeks is one huge breeding frenzy, primed and ready to explode in a passionless parade of perks!