Game: Mumble, mumble, cough.
Genre: Computer game
Format: Neat little disk
Publisher: Japanese
Developer: In house
Price: About 30 quid
Release Date: Soon
Compatible with: TV or monitor; sofa

Yes ladies and gentlemen: the game we've all been waiting for has arrived... and you're sure not to be disappointed (if you like this sort of thing).
Game Kid

This really is a difficult game to categorise. Some might call it a football management simulation, others a 3D platform game. Personally, I'd prefer to call it a driving-shoot 'em up cum strategy-flight simulator with elements of rugby.

The object of the game is simple. You play the dastardly super-hero Princess Colin MacRae, and by collecting pick-ups and exchanging them for lorries you must work your way across the 102 2D levels of Fairy Land on your snowboard without pocketing the white or being arrested by the cops. Bonus points will be eared every time you drag away a boulder and discover a hidden menu. Assuming you don't run out of strawberries, the end of each race occurs when you're the only wrestler left in the ring. A word of warning though, before we consider the game's pros and cons: it's not suitable for kids (unless they like the TeleTubbies).

For a start, this is certainly a beautiful-looking game. In fact, the graphics are downright shoddy. The stunning 16bit hexagonal polygons are the finest the PlayStation has generated so far, so well done Nintendo. The whole world will want to own a PC once they've seen its stunningly rendered chess pieces. Shoot 'em up games will never be the same again. And I tell you: after finishing it you'll know New York like it was your own back yard, even if you've never driven a speedboat before.